A Basic Technique to Influence Others
July 23rd, 2009. Published under Corporate. No Comments.
It goes without saying that people who are in power are influential. They have that quintessential element in their make-up that makes it easier for them than most to get their own way, and believe it or not, this has nothing to do with how much money they have. At different levels of society you find people in positions of “power” - those who have influence over the rest of their group.
An influential person usually doesn’t have a hard time getting other people to do something or listen to his personal views. Basically, an influential person can make things happen with just a snap of the finger. When you are influencing someone, you are changing his behavior in a way. But before you can become a source of influence, you must first have an understanding of the human behavior.
Who would have thought that one little word could be that pivotal factor in influencing others to see things your way? Hard to believe? Well, it’s true. Did you know that the word “because” has a profound effect on the way you influence others?
According to a study conducted in Harvard University, when people use the word “because” often in making a request, they usually get a favorable response. And this is regardless of what comes after the word “because”. Seems giving a “reason” (the “because” of the matter) makes all the difference. Using a “because” justifies your request in the minds of others. It lends importance to your statements or requests. See the difference in this example. Pretend you wish to push in front of a queue to be served first.
“Excuse me, do you mind if I push in to get a cup of coffee?”
“Excuse me, do you mind if I push in to get a cup of coffee because my car is parked illegally outside and I have to hurry.”
Letting you push in might be something done begrudgingly, but the power of the “because” is more likely to see it happen than if you don’t use it.
So when you use the word “because” when you present an idea, expect to have a favorable compliance regardless of what you say.
This way, the word “because” is already a point of influence. It already shows that you are not a control and command leader but one that understands that communication is the key to engagement and explaining purpose is part of effective communication.
Today everyone values their time and energy. Learning the mission, goal or purpose of what we are asked to do helps to promote engagement. Engagement means that your staff (or even your teenager!) is more productive, happy and willing to provide greater service to your clients, teams and stakeholders. Overall everyone wins, just “because.”
Debora McLaughlin: Executive & Business Coach, Speaker, Consultant & Mentor, works with executives, business owners & managers to optimize profits, people & performance. Author of several books including Blueprint for Success with Stephen R. Covey and Ken Blanchard. http://www.opendoorcoaching.com